Trying to Set a Routine

Tonight I wrote again. I didn't get a multitude of words on the page, but I did write. I told myself I need to try and write almost every night so I don't lose my direction. It felt good to write tonight. I started doing the math--because I'm a calculations nut--and discovered if I just wrote 1,000 words every night, I could get my first draft done by the first of February. That's pretty attainable in my eyes. Some nights I only get 500 words, but other nights I get 2,000+. Right now, I'm in the middle of chapter nine with over 16,000 words. I'd like to get 100,000 words in a rough draft and then go back and edit the hell out of it. It feels like a science experiment...

Becoming a Writer

I have a difficult time calling myself a writer. The idea of calling myself that seems false to some degree. I'm a teacher, a mother, a wife, a friend. Not a writer. I've been trying to write more, to work on this novel, but I can't call myself a writer. I picture a writer as someone who obsesses for hours about the written page, slashing it with edits, reworking the words with madness. I don't have that kind of time. I write one day a week at this point (although I'm thinking I need to write at least a little every night starting this next week) and my time is limited, as well as often interrupted. I look at different writing magazines and I struggle with the label of "writer." Will people smirk if I give myself that label, will they scoff? I've been published, twice. Nothing amazingly epic, but I've seen my work in print. I've written reviews for others' writing and my words have been in print regarding those opinions. But still, I can't call myself that name. In one article I recently read, "A Writer's Daily Habit," by Ellen Sussman (Poets & Writer's, DEC. 2011), she states that most writers don't make millions of dollars--they have regular jobs and regular lives, not some dramatized fantasy that I picture. So do I call myself a writer? Maybe not out loud because it feels like I'm speaking something inappropriate. But hopefully I'll feel more comfortable with it soon...maybe when this first novel is complete...

Rework, Rework, Rework---or "Wash, Rinse, Repeat"

Luckily, I have a fabulous husband. I say this for two reasons.

One.

Because I obsessed more than necessary the past couple of weeks, he bought me a Nook Tablet. Not for Christmas or anything. Just because. The tablet is a great addition to my tech obsession. I think it's actually helping me find time to read again, which is something I haven't been able to do with all the 11 hour days I've been putting in at work and with lesson planning. I sat down tonight and started reading a novel...I haven't done that in probably over a year. I love to read, I just can't lately. I'm typically the type that reads 4-5 books at a time, often switching back and forth between them even several times within one day. So, that (being able to read) makes for one happy woman.

Two

He actually sat with me and let me go over my chapter summaries with him. This is a man that, himself, does not read much. He had not even looked at my chapters before. Don't get me wrong; it's not that he's not supportive...he's probably the most supportive husband you could ever get. Reading is just not his thing. But he sat down with me while I went over my chapter summaries with him. I had felt the last five sounded weak. Actually it felt like a buzz kill and not my best work, but I wasn't sure what to do. After talking it out with my husband, though, he asked some very pointed questions that helped me tweak the summaries and rework some well-needed areas and, WOW, I think it will be amazing now...just like I wanted it to be.

Hold on to your hats, I'm working on chapter 8 now and I'm hoping the rest comes flooding afterwards...

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On a side note, he calls my dog "Shit Lips." He hates my dog.

Organized and Ready to Rumble

Tonight I finish up my extended chapter summaries for my ya novel. It started out as 17 chapters, but I think it will now be 19 at least. I've been having fun writing up the summaries and I have been surprised by twists and turns the book has taken--it's in a different place than I thought it would go.

Out of curiosity I looked up a couple of writer's agents today. For some reason as I was looking at the websites about how to submit queries for my novel, I got butterflies in my stomach. Here I am probably a month or so away from my firs

t draft and I'm already nervous. I know I need to get through a few revisions, but to be nervous already? What does that mean? I think I'm a tad scared to think I might go through with it. I'm cautious by nature and this is me getting ready to really throw it out there for the world's judgement.

No writing last night...

I didn't get to write last night as I was making a castle birthday cake for my one-year old baby. Today we had her first birthday. It's a little bittersweet as I enjoy her making it to one and being such a fun little girl, but also sad as I know she's my last baby and she's quickly creeping out of that baby stage. Having a child makes you age faster, contemplate more, worry constantly, and love life deeply...

What Writer's Block Looks Like...

Seriously

I'm elated. Tonight I actually got to work on my book. It's been months--with everything that has been going on--since I've been able to do any writing. I reviewed chapter 1-7, made a character map, and finished a somewhat-workable 1st draft outline for chapters 8-17. I didn't think I had 17 chapters in me! I think the flow is pretty nice and will easily shift into a 2nd book. Yea me!

I've been telling myself the past few weeks, "Friday is my night to write." I give all the other nights to family, lesson planning, etc. But I need one night (at least) to focus on this if I want to do anything with it. I've been so drained by the extra time I'm putting into my job that it's just been impossible to do any writing. I'm angry about that. Why does the job have to be so time consuming and mind sucking? Don't get me wrong--I love my job. However, I want to HAVE A LIFE to some degree. If you ever think teachers have a "cake walk" of a job, I'll give you the finger...